Monday, August 29, 2011

Tomorrow’s the Big Day

While lots of parents are prepping their kids for going back to school this week, we’re prepping for something very different. Tomorrow is the day we’ve been waiting for all summer. We’re headed to off for the day for a full evaluation with an occupational therapist. I’m honestly surprised by how very, very nervous I am. It could be the day that blows open our understanding of his behavior. It could be the day that starts an even longer journey of trying to decipher him. We’re expecting, and preparing for a diagnosis of Sensory Processing Disorder. But we could be told anything. Having an expectation doesn’t make it easier. I think I’m more afraid that they won’t find anything than of any diagnosis we could get.

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It’s so hard to look at your child and KNOW that something just isn’t wired right inside of him. To know that as great as he is he just isn’t “normal.” Chewing a shirt to rags in the span of a day isn’t normal. Suddenly becoming terrified of escalators, or having his hair washed, or a certain pair of shoes isn’t normal.  Changing sheets at  2 am because they are so scratchy he’s in tears isn’t normal. Those may be normal parts of our life, but I know it’s not normal child behavior. And knowing that is harder than I can put into words for anyone who hasn’t been there. If you’ve never been in that spot you can imagine how bad it really feels. To laugh because you know he can’t help it, and so you don’t cry. I often think, as hard as it is for me, I can only imagine how hard it is for him.

Right now I’m trying to make some form of order out of his inch thick file of paperwork and past evals, so that I can take it with us.

Tomorrow morning I’m prepping the crock-pot for dinner. His appointment is at 1, we have to arrive about 30 minutes early. The trip is around 30 minutes to an hour, but they sent us a note to prepare for excessive traffic.  We’re leaving home around 11. Then the evaluation is 2 1/2 hours. Then we leave in rush hour to come home. Blu doesn’t know there is a new Leapster game sitting in his car seat waiting for him. I’m hoping it will give him something to entertain him, give him something to talk about, and reward him in advance for how very long and hard the day will be.

Meanwhile everything else is on hold. The next 24 hours may be the longest of my life.

Any words of encouragement greatly appreciated in the comments.

Friday, August 26, 2011

Ahhh Survival

It's been awhile since I've posted. There is just so much going on in my life right now I feel like I'm surviving due to sheer will to survive. It's all out survival mode here. But here's a recap of what's going on in my life:

Blu has his appointment coming up Tuesday for an evaluation. Hopefully it will give us some answers as to his sensory seeking behavior. The other day when he got dressed he put on a shirt that looked like new, by 12 it had a few chewed holes, but 3 it looked like a rag. Literally chewed to shreds. Yeah. I'm taking it with me to his appointment.

I'm having a heap load of thyroid problems. At least one thyroid nodule is showing up by ultrasound, plus 5 "spots." In the past month I've had two doses of blood work, 2 ultrasounds of my thyroid, and an endocrinologist visit. Next up is the hospital for some crazy pictures that involve me taking radiated iodine pills. The whole thing is depleting my vitamins. I'm so low in Vitamin D that I'm on pretty high doses, but still just hurt a lot. It's actually the main reason I haven't written here. If you didn't know the thyroid can be linked to a lot of brain function. Honestly my brain is barely working at all. When writing I skip whole words, lose my train of thought, make horrible spelling mistakes, and more. I sound as though I lack all sense, and I'm tired and lazy. I've turned into a brain dead sloth.

AND it's the new school year! We do a pretty lax style of school here, it is just preschool after all (I just misspelled school, see what I mean?) I'm trying to focus on creating a rhythm of our day (just misspelled rhythm) and to our week. Next year is the big K, kindergarten, and I want our rhythm to be so set by then that it is happening and Blu doesn't even realize it.

I have two plans:
Incorporate learning sessions into our day, such as reading after breakfast, so that it just happens


Creating a general theme to each weekday. Such as Monday is cooking, Tuesday is art, Wednesday is science, etc. The actual theme is still being decided, there is a lot of planning going on.

Here's what I hope the finished item will look like, as an example because nothing is decided yet:
Wake between 9-10
After waking we always wrestle, joke, snuggle, etc for awhile
Make Breakfast
Reading- usually he picks one short book, then I pick one big chapter book and read a few chapters.
After reading it's free play or a field trip, or running errands
lunch around 12-1
After lunch a cooking session (or wrap lunch into the cooking session depending on what we're making)
Free play
PE before dinner (because then Daddy is home and helps tire him out, they work out, play sports, ride bikes outside to the park, etc)
Dinner at 6
Quiet time after dinner (play any quiet game, leapster, read for fun, etc)
Bed at 8 where we read, he picks one short book and I then read a long one until he's asleep.

Then Tuesday would be almost exactly the same, only instead of cooking it's be an art project.
Then Wednesday instead of art or cooking it would be a science experiment.
Then Thursday a nature walk or nature center after lunch.
Friday would have.... well I don't know yet.

Right now that is pretty much our day, minus a project always being after lunch, and minus the reading after we wake up. The rest actually is our current rhythm. So I just need to add in those two things.

This year it works out with having a human body project ongoing with some local homeschoolers either once a week or once every two weeks (I said the details are still be planned right?) We'll have an ongoing art class through the rec center, an art class with in depth study of the masters and quality projects with some homeschooling friends, and probably a nature group for our nature study.

So I haven't been writing much because my brain is dead, my life is crazy, I'm planning like mad, trying to hold onto my sanity wile Blu devours clothes, AND then doing fun things like keeping up our new family scrapbook. As I start feeling better I will post more and more, in the meantime please bear (bare?? I can never remember) with me while I try to survive. And please forgive any crazy typos or spelling problems. I SWEAR I'm not an idiot!!!!