Saturday, February 4, 2012

Explaining It All

Recently we had a situation at our house. My friend had driven to our house (30 minutes just fyi) with her daughter who is Blu’s age, her severely disabled son, and also her baby. Not long after she arrived one of Blu’s friends from our neighborhood came over. The situation was just to much and led to a lot, and I mean A LOT, of shrieking, crying, and more, almost all from Blu. I had to send our neighbor home, and explained Blu just wasn’t in the mood to play. Today we went over to invite our neighbor over again. I say we because despite it being a visable distance away, very close, on our street, sharing a sidewalk, Blu is to anxious to go by himself. Today when we went neighbor Mom immediately asked “Was he well behaved?? Was he the reason he got sent home?” The thought that she’d think that had never occurred to me. (Boy what a sentence) I just explained it that Blu was overwhelmed, and just couldn’t handle it all. She asked if Blu was allowed to play at their house. I replied that he is allowed, but I doubt he ever would.

We walked home, sans neighbor child who will be coming over later, and I realized that my weak comments may have left her puzzled, but I try not to talk about Blu’s issues in front of Blu. So I decided to write her a letter. It’s on a simple notecard, and I am sending it over to her later. Then I realized how this small notecard is such a sum up of us. I’m going to write it here for you, only I’m switching the neighbor kid’s name to John, that’s not his real name.

“Hi!

I wanted to take a quick minute to explain to you a bit about Blu. I try not to talk about it to much in front of him, so writing it is easier. Blu has Sensory Processing Disorder. Which among other things means sometimes small things, like noise, really (Really!) bother him. He also has multiple speech issues. So when he gets upset sometimes he just shrieks like a maniac, or will do things like push, yell, or snatch toys. Because he just can’t find the words to express himself. On top of both of those he also has moderate to severe anxiety. So he may never be willing to play at your house without me. I don’t know.

So all this means that sometimes I may need to send John home, just because it’s to much for Blu. Blu may also do things sometimes that are mean to John. Never anything dangerous but just things that me be upsetting to John. Blu likes John very much. I just wanted you to know some of what can be expected. I’d hate for Blu’s issues to affect their friendship. –Alicia

PS. He also chews a lot. and usually will have some form of “chewy” for him to chew on, but he has been known to damage some things by chewing. If he ever does play at your house and damages anything, or is just to much to handle, please just bring him home and let me know.”

Our life sometimes seems to everyday to me, I forget that not everyone gets it. I forget that people don’t know he won’t do certain things. I forget that not everyone knows his quirks. My crazy quirky boy. I wouldn’t trade him for anything, but explaining him, well I’d trade that.

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